Once I told, I could tell I was different. No, literally. I could tell there was a difference in me. I felt lighter. I became aware of my feelings around saying what worked best for me without guilt. I smiled at that revelation.
We watched my YouTube video together. There were five of us. My grand kids were ages 6 to 11 years old. We talked about how different things could have been had I spoke up right away. What if I told when I was a young teenager?
What if I told when I was a young lady?
What college would I have went away to?
They said, “Mom would your life have been that different?
“Oh yes!” I explained, anytime you speak up for yourself things will be different.
“I would have been even more powerful in my spirit. I see now that I should not have been afraid to tell that someone had hurt me.”
“I’m sure I would have been less afraid of anything. I would have had the experience of ‘telling’ even though I was afraid to tell.”
“Telling has made me stronger and more confident in myself”
They listened intently.
“Of course my darlings, you would still be my grand children because you were always inside of me.”
We watched my YouTube video twice. They asked more questions. I asked them many questions about fear as well. I asked if they had ever been afraid to tell something and why. I was amazed at the answers. I learned a lot from them. The more we talked, the more they wanted to talk about incidents at school and on the park. They told me things they thought were inappropriate. I learned that my eleven year old grand daughter had been confided in by a girl in her class. She said the girl told her she had been molested. My grand daughter said she encouraged the girl to tell her mom, but the girl said, “No I can’t.”
The girl explained that god was mad at her, and she couldn’t tell her mom.
(Of course I will inquire more and contact the school with this information)
It is paramount that we talk at length with our children. This was the first time my grand daughter told of her friend. I created an atmosphere for us to laugh and talk. I may have never heard that story had I not created the opportunity to hear it. We can’t advise or correct our children unless we understand their train of thoughts.
Talk to your kids in a pleasant environment as soon as you can. Take the time, especially with the young ones. They will open up and talk to you.